“I am” vs. “You are” – How To Do Your Affirmations

Well written affirmations are a great way of boosting your self-confidence, as they help you to think positively and keep you focused on achieving your goals. This article will help you to form the best affirmations.

I am vs you are affirmations – what is the best way to compose them? Positive affirmations that start with “I am” are more effective than ones that begin with “You are”. For example, the statement “I learn from my mistakes” is more personal and powerful than “You learn from your mistakes”. Affirmations that start with “I am” sound as if they are coming from your subconscious whereas “You are” affirmations could sound like they are being directed to you from someone else.

Do Positive Affirmations Work?

When composed in the right way positive affirmations can help you to be more goal-driven. They can also assist you to win the battle against negative and self-destructive thinking, helping you to improve your outlook on life.

So what goes into forming an effective list of positive affirmations?

  • Keep the statements short. Condense your ideas into a few keywords so that you will be able to commit the affirmations to memory.
    • Example: “Even if things don’t turn out as well as you had planned the first time keep trying” could be written as “I never give up”.
  • Turn negatives into positives. We all have negative things about our personalities that we would like to change, but we don’t need to be reminded of them every day. Make sure your affirmations are all positive and upbuilding.
    • Example: “I keep making the same mistakes over and over again” could be written as “I forgive myself for not being perfect”.
  • Start your statements with “I am” rather than “You are”. Statements that begin with “I am” are more personal and are easier to relate to.
    • Example: “I am a positive person” is more effective than “It is important to be a positive person”.
  • Write your affirmations in the present tense. Writing in the present tense will help you to view your affirmations as goals that you can begin striving towards today rather than something uncertain that you may or may not achieve in the future.
    • Example: “I make the best out of every situation” is a better affirmation than “I will make the best out of every situation”.
  • Start with realistic goals. Making affirmations out of goals that you will not be able to achieve in the near future can be disheartening and will discourage you from viewing your affirmations as a source of encouragement. Try keeping your biggest and most difficult goal to the end of your list of affirmations and placing smaller goals that help you get to the bigger goal at the beginning of the list.

How To Improve Your Self-Esteem.

One of the many reasons affirmations are so popular is because they work wonders for your self-esteem. If you are not a very confident person, then you could find that going through a list of positive affirmations each day will help you to expel negative thoughts from your mind and will help you have a more positive attitude towards your day.

But asides from personal affirmations, what other steps can you take to boost your self-esteem? Here are some suggestions that you can begin putting into practice immediately!

Learn To Accept Compliments.

It can sometimes feel awkward to accept compliments for something when you think that the thing you have done was rather mundane and didn’t require any special attention. More often than not, people with a low self-esteem tend to deflect compliments by saying things like:

  • “So-and-so did most of the work”
  • “It wasn’t that good” or
  •  “Last time it was so much better”.

Instead of dismissing compliments or providing reasons why they aren’t valid, you must learn to accept compliments when they come your way. Try some of the following tips that will help you to react well when you are on the receiving end of a compliment.

  • Humbly say “thank you”. Thanking someone for the compliment they have given you is not arrogant, rather it shows that you acknowledge your hard work and are grateful that someone has taken notice of it.
  • Appreciate a team effort. It is always good to give credit where it’s due so, if you have been working on a group project and are the only one receiving the praise for it, make sure you acknowledge your team mate’s work, but without deflecting all of the glory onto them.
  • Maintain visual contact. Looking at the ground or looking away immediately after receiving a compliment is like telling someone you do not deserve it. Instead of non-verbally deflecting the compliment, smile, retain good eye contact, and thank the person who complimented you.

Be Kind To Yourself.

That little voice inside your head that is constantly showering you with negative thoughts must be silenced and a great way to do that is by not feeding negativity. Here’s how:

  • When you try your best to do something and it doesn’t quite work out, concentrate on the positives rather than the negatives. Ask yourself:
    • “What experience did I gain in this situation?”
    •  “What goals did I achieve along the way?”
    • “What did I learn about myself that I didn’t know before?”.
  • Talk to yourself as you would do a close friend, using kind words when you express yourself.
  • Think of five things that you like about your personality and then say them out loud. Write these qualities on a piece of paper and stick them somewhere you can see them and be reminded of them daily such as on the fridge or over a bedroom mirror.

Cut The Comparisons.

Everyone has different strengths and abilities but you should avoid comparing yourself with others that seem to be more talented than you are. In reality, just because someone can do something better than you can, doesn’t mean that you are less skilled than them in every avenue.

Someone who can sing, play the guitar, and doesn’t mind being the center of attention may be great fun to be around – but don’t put yourself down! Overly confident people are often poor great listeners or sometimes find it difficult to sympathize with people when they are going through difficulties.

So, although you may not be a party starter, you may be the first person someone thinks of calling when they need a listening ear.

Remember – we are all different and everyone has their weaknesses and insecurities, even though they may not appear to!

Get Some Exercise.

Being an active person is also a fantastic way of improving your self-esteem. Why? Exercise encourages the body to produce endorphins which are the hormones that make you feel good.

You don’t have to start training for the next marathon, but as little as 15 minutes of exercise a day will get your blood pumping and start charging those endorphins around your system.

Set Small Goals.

There is nothing wrong with being ambitious and setting goals for yourself, but if you are not careful with the way you set your goals you may end up feeling overwhelmed and disappointed when you are not able to achieve them. Try the following:

  • Set small goals. Make a list of goals starting with things that you can begin to achieve this very week. Making mini stepping stones that lead to a large goal will help keep you motivated and will encourage you to focus on the finish line.
  • Set timeframes for your goals as this will keep you moving forward but do not be overly specific as this could be discouraging if you cannot reach the goal on time. For example, write down the month you would like to achieve a certain goal without including the date.
  • Analyze each step of your goal. If the miniature steps between the goal involve you completing a large number of tasks that you’re simply not interested in then you could find you are setting yourself up for failure. Instead, make sure your goals are based around topics that intrigue you.

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