How to be Happy with Yourself that No One Told You

How to be Happy with Yourself that No One Told You

Being content with yourself is one of the must-have superpowers. However, most of us think that our happiness is not in our hands. But that’s not true. Our brains can be trained to be happy. You are always in control of your well-being and happiness. In this article, I will teach you how to be happy with yourself.  

If you are looking for a short solution to being happy on your own, apply this simple technique every time you feel down. First, inhale deeply and, while breathing in, draw all the positive things you want to see in yourself in your mind. And then, while breathing out, purge out all the negative stuff currently present in you, blocking your path to happiness.

This simple meditation technique balances out your mind and makes you more relaxed. When your mind is calm, you can focus more and worry less. Unnecessary worrying can block the path to your happiness and overall well being. But only meditation doesn’t work, then I’ve discussed a lot of other ways you can make your life much happier.  So, let’s get going!

What makes life happy?

In short, success makes life happy. But how you are defining success has a significant role to play in your way to happiness. So, ask yourself, what does success mean to me? Does it mean to have your dream job? Or, is it having a family? Maybe, you want both of them? What you need to understand here is success doesn’t have a definition written in stone.

The definition of success varies from person to person. And everyone’s definition is correct from their life’s perspectives. Your definition doesn’t have to be on par with anyone else’s definition. And no one should judge you for your life’s purpose. After all, it’s your life and your choices. It’s better to have a fulfilling life rather than having regrets.

Suppose, if you want to get married and have a family, then no one has any right to judge you. Contrarily, if your goal is to have a successful job or business, that’s fantastic, and you don’t have any right to judge the one who has a different goal in life than yours. Don’t change your definition of success because you fear judgment.

Before you decide on what you want in life, I would like to make you cautious about one thing. The definition of success changes from time to time. I will explain it to you in details-

If you ponder on your past, you would see that you have changed your goal in life from time to time. It’s hard to find someone who has chosen the exact career path which they envisioned in their childhood. We change what we want to be until we are adults. But if you feel like changing what you want to be after you are an adult, that’s okay too. 

So, I would like to make you cautious about one thing. When you decide how you want to define success in your life, don’t rush into things, especially when you are younger. As we grow old, we gather experiences and our perspectives change. If you rush into the final decision and be impulsive, it is likely that you will have to change your definition of success repeatedly.

15 Tips On Being Happier 

You are in control of your happiness. I know how impossible it sounds. We have kind of accepted that our lives are in control of our luck, and we have to let life go as our luck directs it. But it’s not true. If you know what you truly want in life, you can exercise control over how you feel negative emotions. Here are fifteen tips on how to be happy with yourself-

  1. Smile even when you don’t feel like it

Smiling, even though it hurts, is not only a cliched philosophical quote. Research has shown that smiling every day without any triggering factor helps us cope with the difficulties of life more effectively. When we smile, we generate the happy hormones known as endorphins and lowers the level of stress hormones known as cortisol.

So practice smiling every day even if there is no trigger factor. You can also practice laughing yoga. Just relax and sit in a quiet place, then breathe in deeply and laugh out as loud as you can. 

  1. Focus on your goals

Depression creeps into your psyche when you don’t have a definite goal in your life. Moreover, accomplishing a goal releases the contentment-inducing hormones, which makes you feel good and proud of yourself. So, it’s vital to have a definite big goal in your life. Work towards that goal everyday step by step.

To accomplish that big goal, plan smaller goals that you can carry out every day. Also, have a routine and follow that particular routine religiously. Following and accomplishing a routine can have a positive impact on your mental wellbeing.

  1. Do what you love to do

Depression creeps into your psyche when you don’t have a definite goal in your life. Moreover, accomplishing a goal releases the contentment-inducing hormones, which makes you feel good and proud of yourself. So, it’s important to have a definite big goal in your life. Work towards that goal everyday step by step.

To accomplish that big goal, plan smaller goals that you can carry out every day. Also, have a routine and follow that particular routine religiously. Following and accomplishing a routine can have a positive impact on your mental wellbeing.

  1. Don’t let judgment take over you

Judgments affect our wellbeing in the worst possible manner. I know how hard it is to overlook the fault-finding people always picking at you. But for your wellbeing, you have to avoid their judgments. But how to do it?

If you are genuinely convinced about yourself and your self-worth and sure about your life goals, their ill-treatment of you can’t hamper your wellbeing. Be assured that your self-worth can’t be diminished by their false notions about yourself.

If it’s hampering your wellbeing, confront them and tell them how toxic their behavior is. If that person is a close friend of yours, and even after talking, they are unable to change their behavior, remove yourself from that relationship for your wellbeing.

  1. Rejoice in little achievements 

Celebrating your little achievement has a positive impact on your psyche. It makes you feel good about yourself. You feel more confident and motivated to do more. If you feel like your little day to day victories are not worth celebrating, you have to work to change that thinking pattern.

Your small victories make you one step ahead of your bigger goal. Of course, they are worth celebrating. Give yourself a treat for achieving that smaller but essential goal. You deserve this.

  1. Don’t be repetitive in your life 

Being repetitive in life kills your inner creativity. Instead, be creative with your life. Even in the smaller things, pour your creativity. It will give you two benefits- first, you will never be bored and stay motivated, and second, your brain will benefit from this. It will be more active, and your mental wellbeing will be protected.

  1. Meditate 

Meditation is a helpful way to purge out all the negativity from you. Almost everyone, who has tried meditation, got nothing but wholesome goodness from it. So, give it a try. There is an abundance of YouTube videos teaching people mindfulness meditation. Practicing mindfulness makes you aware of your feelings, either positive or negative.

  1. Don’t excessively worry about the future 

Excessively worrying does nothing but destroys your inner wellbeing. Yes, healthy levels of worrying are relatively good for your mental health. But an excess of it ruins your mental health and inner calmness.

How do you recognize if you are worrying excessively? If you find yourself worrying incessantly and doing no productive work, then it’s called excessive worrying, which is detrimental to both physical and mental health.

  1. Be grateful

Practicing gratitude is a way to heal your mental health. Research has shown that being grateful has a positive impact on overall mental well-being. So be grateful for the little blessings which keep you going. Perhaps, it’s a loving parent or a loyal friend. No matter what, be grateful for the little things which bring you joy in life.

  1. Be with your friends and family 

Loving friends and family are a much-unappreciated blessing in life. Imagine how many people don’t even have that and have to deal with their struggles all alone. So, utilize that blessing and be with the people who unconditionally love you. Talk to them when you are facing problems in life. They are your most trusted advisors. Cherish them!

  1. Be kind without any motive 

Practicing kindness is another way to deal with negativity. Be kind to people, even if their behavior is toxic. Maybe kindness is all they need to revert their behavior. A little bit of kindness never goes amiss. When you wake up in the morning, remind yourself that you will be kind to all the people you meet throughout the day.

  1. Cry when you feel like 

Crying is the perfect antidote to revert sadness. Cry when you feel like and as much as you want. Also, you release various feel good hormones after you cry. So, holding back your tears, will do you more harm than you realize. Sometimes people are prejudiced against crying, especially if you are a man. Crying helps everyone, irrespective of gender.

  1. Deal with disappointment smartly

Disappointments are part and parcel of life. We can’t avoid it. But we can deal with it smartly. When you are disappointed, don’t try to put on a tough face and withdraw yourself from talking about it. Suppose you had a really bad day. If you don’t talk about it and pretend that everything is fine, then you are fooling only yourself.

Instead, go out with a trusted friend and talk about it. Maybe they can give you a solution and uplift your mood. Holding disappointments within yourself only destroys your wellbeing. So, deal with your negative emotions when confronted with disappointments smartly. 

  1. Listen to music. 

Music has healing properties. Recently, during an operation on an infant, doctors played piano to see the effect of music on the human body. The baby’s body responded positively in the experiment. Moreover, we have numerous researches and studies ensuring the positive impact music has on our mental health.

So, listen to good music and have your mood uplifted. But choose your genre of music wisely. Melodious and soothing music has a calming effect on the human body. Don’t listen to music that induces excitement before going to bed.

  1. Be wise with money 

Being wise with spending money saves you from unnecessary negative emotions. Firstly, you feel good about spending money wisely when you do it. Secondly, it saves money for the future and saves you from the stress of having an inadequate amount of money. 

You see, money is an important and necessary thing to sustain in life. No one can argue that. People who say that money can’t buy happiness haven’t seen much of life. No matter how solvent you think you are, always be careful with money.

How Do I Stop Being So Insecure?

How to be Happy with Yourself that No One Told You

Insecurity plagues even the best of us. Even if we have the most powerful self-esteem, we feel down and insecure about ourselves from time to time. But luckily, there are some foolproof ways to fight insecurity. You just have to believe in yourself and practice the thirteen tips to stop being insecure I have compiled for you-

Don’t underestimate your self-worth 

Always remember that you are worth it no matter what anyone says. Don’t ever question your self-worth. That’s the first step towards building up insecurity in yourself. If you find yourself thinking you are not worthy enough, think about all the positive things you have achieved in your life. Revert all the negative thoughts by being positive.

Being too sensitive about your flaws or mistakes only makes you feel worse about yourself. Instead, learn from them. Always dwell on the positive rather than the negative. You made a mistake because you didn’t know the outcome. That’s all! No need to be overly sensitive about it.  

Indulge in self-care

Self-care is a surefire way to feel good about yourself and enhance your self-worth. When you are feeling insecure and down, indulge in self-worth. You feel good about yourself and worthy. 

Suppose, if someone rejects you as a romantic partner, you can indulge in self-worth like going to a spa or buy yourself a treat. You will feel good.

Catch your negative thoughts 

Catching your negative thoughts is another way to purge out negativity from yourself. When you find yourself thinking negatively about a particular incident, catch that thought and then rectify your thinking pattern. In this way, you will be more mindful and aware of your negative thoughts and save yourself from the negative outcome of that thought.

No matter what happens, always focus on the positive outcomes of an otherwise negative incident. Suppose your new business venture is not doing as well as you have thought about it. You don’t have to be all broken and sad by it. Instead, plan new approaches to build your client base and advertise what you are doing.

Spend time with people you love

As we have discussed earlier, having friends and family who love you is a huge underappreciated blessing. Cherish every moment with the people you love because they are your healers. Trust then and talk to them about your problems. Appreciate them and show the equal amount of kindness to them as they are showing to you.

Learn how to tackle tricky situations smartly 

Educate yourself on tackling tricky situations. Read self-help books and learn what to do to face troubling problems in life. For example, you are feeling sad because you didn’t get the job you wanted very much.

Train your brain to take the entire situation more positively. Like you have garnered a new experience in job hunting, it will help you in your next venture.

Do what you love 

Doing what you love has a positive impact on your wellbeing. When you love your job, it doesn’t feel like working. It feels like having fun all day long. So, it is important to love what you are doing. Even in a relationship, if you feel like you don’t belong with the person, remove yourself from that relationship. The same equation goes for your job.  

Take small steps towards your bigger goal. As I have said earlier, it is important to have one definite and big goal in your life. And work yourself towards that big goal by dividing it into smaller, day to day goals. Of course, these goals have to be achievable. Don’t set unachievable and difficult goals as not meeting them will cause problems for you. 

Speak to a therapist

If you find yourself unable to make yourself happy no matter what you do, it’s time to speak to a therapist. There’s no shame in seeing an expert relieve your pain. On the contrary, it shows how responsible you are as a human being and committed to making you feel better, so others feel comfortable in your company.

Exercise and meditate 

Exercising has proven health benefits- be it mental or physical health. It releases happy hormones such as oxytocin. When you are feeling particularly low, exercise to make yourself happy. Meditation has more significant and more profound benefits on mental health than exercise. Practice mindfulness meditation and build your mental strength up.

Try to follow a routine when you exercise. Like if you exercise three times a week, try to be committed to it. When it comes to meditation, you should try to do it regularly, at least fifteen minutes. Try to find that amount of time for yourself every day.

Read self-help books

Later on, in this article, I have presented you with some excellent books on happiness. These self-help books will help you immensely. Other than that, talk with your friends and family to recommend some excellent books on how to help yourself when you are not feeling okay.

Self-help books on positive psychology are helping people who need to recondition their brain to think more positively. Books never fail to help us. So, I will advise you to keep reading even in your worst time. It will help you.

Keep a diary

Writing about your negative feelings cuts its effect down to at least 50%. So write logs in a diary every day. It helps you understand your thought patterns and enables you to change how you think. Some of our thoughts don’t make sense at all. They are so petty and trivial that when we write them down, we realize that they are not worth our time.

I am not saying that the sadness you are feeling is unimportant and doesn’t need any notice. Your every bit of sorrow deserves your full attention to diminish it. But sometimes, the thought behind your most profound sadness doesn’t have a definite logic behind it. Writing it down makes it clearer to comprehend fully.

5 book Recommendations On Being Happy. 

Books are always your best friends. Even when you feel down and unhappy in your life, some choicest self-help books can help you recover. These books will help you find a new meaning in life and will change your idea to deal with unhappiness. Here are 5 book recommendations for you on being happy-

1. Think like a monk, by Jay Shetty

Jay Shetty had poured all his knowledge of the time when he lived as a monk in this book. If we instilled a monk-like thinking style in our day to day life, things would get much easier to handle. This book teaches you how to think like a monk and overcome your fear and find real purpose in your life.

Key takeaways:

  • Learn to train your mind to tackle your fears. 
  • Learn how to practice forgiveness. 
  • Learn how to find true purpose in life with a monk-like thinking style. 

2. The Art of Happiness, by the Dalai Lama and Howard C. Cutler

When it comes to cracking the secrets of being happy, the Dalai Lama is the master of it. Even after going through a mountain of losses, the Dalai Lama manages to smile and say a definite yes when asked every time if he has found happiness. This book is hailed as a milestone in positive psychology. 

Key takeaways:

  • Learn how to find inner peace.
  • Learn the importance of kindness in day to day life. 
  • Learn how to see the bigger picture in life. 

3. Stumbling on Happiness, by Daniel Gilbert

As a psychology professor at Harvard, Daniel Gilbert has poured all his knowledge on the science of happiness in this book. This book teaches us why we make wrong decisions in life and train your brain to build your happiness up. It also teaches us to make a change in ourselves to create happiness.

Key takeaways: 

  • Learn to train your brain to create happiness for you. 
  • Learn to compare things for values, not prices.
  • Learn how experience, even though unsatisfactory, is better than no experience.

4. Authentic Happiness, by Martin Seligman

For a long time, psychology was focused on dealing with the “wrongness” of human nature. Now, as the field of positive psychology is emerging, we have begun to understand and appreciate the positive emotions in ourselves.

This book will help you learn how to bring authentic happiness by identifying and nurturing your core strengths in your day to day life.

Key takeaways: 

  • Learn about positive emotions and their purpose beyond making us feel good. 
  • Learn how to channel authentic positive emotions. 
  • Learn how to be lastingly happy. 

5. The Happiness Advantage, by Shawn Achor

How to optimize your productivity and performance by channeling maximum amounts of positive feelings? This book teaches you how to do it. It lists some principles and techniques to recondition our brains to make us feel lastingly happy and cheerful.

Key takeaways:

  • Learn about seven principles to rewire your brain to be lastingly happy. 
  • Learn how to change your behavior towards preconceived notions about happiness. 
  • Learn how to make happiness last long. 

Conclusion

So here comes the end of our blog post on how to be happy with yourself.  I hope I was able to give you an insight into how to channel positive feelings in your life and enhance your overall well being. As an ending note, I would like to add that you never stop believing that you are in control of your happiness. Also, never doubt your right to be happy.

Thanks for stopping by! Good luck!