Gaming addiction is a severe addiction. The time has passed when this was only a stage that teenage boys went through. Nowadays, grown men (and women) are also addicted to sitting in front of a screen and playing games. Add virtual reality to the game, and it’s even harder for them to break away to face the everyday challenges of real life.
If your boyfriend is addicted to video games and not giving you the attention you deserve, you have a decision to make. By having a serious discussion, let him know how his lifestyle affects your life and your relationship with him. First, he must decide if you are more important to him than a game.
No set number of hours needs to be played to qualify as being addicted to gaming; however, when the game becomes more important than anything else in life and causes the gamer to stop participating in real life, there is a problem. Although people of all ages are involved in gaming, stats show that it’s mainly young men who develop an addiction to the fantasy gaming world that offers them more excitement than real life. So what do we do with a boyfriend who is addicted to video games?
Struggles Of Having A BF With Video Game Addiction
If you do have a boyfriend with a gaming addiction, you are not alone! Many young boys play harmless video games and, as men, find it very difficult to give up the games they have enjoyed for so long. New exciting and interactive games are released by gaming companies every day, all designed to entice the gamer into the world of make-believe.
Having a partner with a gaming addiction can disrupt your life and cause unhappiness and a lot of strife in the relationship. Many women feel isolated when their boyfriends have gaming problems. Gaming is generally a secretive addiction, often played out behind closed doors, far away from others who don’t know how bad the habit is.
Most gaming widows experience feelings of hurt, fear, loneliness, confusion, and despair. They battle with self-esteem problems and live with anger and resentment towards their better half. Many women feel neglected and left out of their boyfriend’s gaming world.
If you are not sure if your boyfriend does have a severe gaming addiction or only enjoys playing a particular game, check the below list for symptoms. If any of these points listed below are familiar to you, he has a problem!
- He completely ignores you when he is playing a game. Life only exists within the game.
- If you try to talk to him, he gets angry with you and tries to bush you off as you are interrupting his game.
- He accuses you of nagging and complains that you don’t understand how much the game means to him.
- He is emotionally detached from you and avoids you and any conversation.
- He lies to you to conceal the amount of time that he spends playing the game.
- He skips work often and takes no responsibility for any household duties.
- All his money is spent on new games or updates to existing games.
How To Make Your BF Give More Attention To You
The only way to get the attention you deserve from your boyfriend is to take charge and make a difference in both of your lives. While quitting might be hard for him to do, he may be willing to compromise and stop playing for scheduled time with you.
Get professional help if all else fails. If he is really that important to you and you want the relationship to go further, then you may have to get help from a professional counselor to help with his gaming problem.
So, if your boyfriend is addicted to video games, here is what you can do to make him give you more attention.
- Talk to him without nagging or getting upset. If you can, go on a date away from the game or request a lunch break away from the game if he won’t leave the house.
- Suggest outings to replace his solo game time with something that you will both enjoy, like paintball, laser tag, or airsoft. Show him that spending time with you can also be exciting!
- Agree to a set schedule for your relationship, including gaming nights for him and date nights with you.
- Don’t join him in playing his games. By joining him, you will allow him to think that his gaming hours are acceptable and fun, which is not the case. If he does want to spend any one-on-one time with you, it has to be away from his game.
- Stop providing for his every need. If he needs to eat, he should leave the game and fend for himself in the real world! Join him for lunch and remind him that you are special to him!
- Invite him on dates during the hours that he generally plays games. Break the habit!
- Play the girlfriend card and seduce him! Hopefully, he will find you more exciting than his game – use this card sparingly though and keep it in reserve for special occasions.
Learning To Give Him Some Space
Although giving him the space that he might need and even ask for could hurt your terribly, it might be the best thing to do for your relationship. To get back on track with your boyfriend by giving him some space might be a good thing. Relationships suffer when one partner feels suffocated by the other even if they are in love.
So, before he asks for some space in the relationship (you can read the signs and know that it’s coming), why not try these tips before he even asks you? Then, you could make your relationship stronger without losing him!
- Don’t nag or badger him – give him his space!
- Stop any kind of contact with him: no calls, texts, or social media. By not knowing what is going on in your life, he will start to miss you!
- Stop worrying that you are going to lose him and arrange something that you enjoy. Meet a friend or read a book, anything which takes your mind off him! Focus on yourself for a while.
- Don’t chase after him. You will always be OK, no matter what happens.
- Respect his decision to have some me time and allow him to make decisions for himself. Understand that you can’t control his choices.
- Believe that things will work out for the best in your relationship, whichever way it goes.
- While giving him the space that he wants, think about the kind of relationship that you want. Does he still measure up?
- Put a time limit on the time out; it can’t last forever!
Having a boyfriend who is addicted to video games can be challenging. Putting your life on hold while he plays games without you is not what you expected from your relationship. If you love him enough, then invest in his life and the relationship by setting boundaries and expecting him to follow through.
If he doesn’t and has cut himself off from you, perhaps it’s time to think about the future of the relationship.
By allowing him space to decide what is more important in his life, he may realize that he does indeed have a gaming addiction and make the changes that he needs to in his life before it’s too late and he loses you.